Why We Infiltrated & TOOK DOWN FLDS Polygamous Cult Leader (My Story) [16:59-22:04]

knowing you were spiritually married to this man? Or did he force you to isolate? My family did not become, they did not convert to Mormonism. And I was absolutely under extreme coercion, not to tell anyone. He said, if I ever told anyone, he would deny it. You know, it put the gold plates that these ancient gold plates with engravings on them that had these sacred scriptures. It would put that all at risk. And I, you know, I thought I could be responsible for destroying the plan for the second coming, you know, so I did not tell my father, you know. Yeah, that's high stakes for sure. And that's also a play right out of Joseph Smith playbook. So did your family then notice the decline because things got pretty dark with this man and the expectations that he had of you? Were you seeing them at all or you were just completely alone in this? No, my family lived in Michigan. And I was in Utah. And I wasn't communicating anything to them, you know, that would concern them. Maybe a check-in once in a while. But they had no idea. It also didn't seem that unusual because I lived overseas so much. And, you know, at that time, we weren't like, they weren't happy that I joined the LDS church. We had a little bit of distance anyway. I mean, we don't know. We're so close. But that was a vulnerable period for me. Are you comfortable talking about some of the expectations that he had of you? Well, he wanted me to pass tests. And he would give me the scriptures talking about why tests are required. And since I was supposed to be the wife of the prophet, I had to prove myself more than other women. In fact, he wanted me to descend below all things, like almost like the trials of Job. Otherwise, people would forever and throughout eternity be wondering why I was the one in the last days called to assist him if I didn't go through these things. So he had all kinds of tests that went from smaller. I needed to sell my extra items. Anything extra had to be sold. Then it was things that were precious to me had to be sold and given up because in the Mormon church and the days of Nago, people sacrificed like their beautiful China and other expensive things to help with the temple. So he always pulled from things that were in my historical database of what makes sense within church history. In the Tokyo series, I was surprised to see there was a little clip of me doing a pageant. Yeah, I didn't even know that was in there. Okay, so when I was wearing a black dress, and I designed that black dress, you know, it had like rhinestones right here and it had a flowy thing in the back. And I designed it perfectly for my body. And I was so proud of it. It was the first thing I ever designed. And that was one of the things that I had to go. And I was pretty heartbroken over it. Another thing was that I had found a a vintage Jessica McClendon wedding dress for when I would get married again because in my first marriage, I didn't I didn't own a wedding dress with this rented one. I wanted to have a wedding dress that I could leave for my daughter. So I found like the dream wedding dress and I was able to buy it and save it that had to go. Things like that. So it went into this fun that allegedly helped the poor and needy. The test got worse from there. He had me separated from my children and he wanted to make it permanent. You know, and then I became idle. Originally he told me it was for their safety. And then it was just so cruel and in depraved. Then he exploited me my body or his own financial benefit. And so then I was really I was so traumatized. You know, I don't know if I should talk about unaliving myself, but I made a few steps towards that on different occasions. And so because I thought if he's not who he says he is, then I have slept with someone upside the bonds of marriage. And I will be excommunicated from the church never to be let back in. I will lose my soul. He's not a prophet. If he is a prophet, then and I don't do these things that he's asking, then I will also lose my soul.