Best of David Cross Comedy | Stand-Up Comedy Compilation [7:22-9:06]

And to give you an example of what a piece of shit I am, this is 100% true. I was in Brooklyn. I was walking down the street. It was going to do a set to get ready to go out on tour. And I'm walking down the street. And you know, we have those COVID outdoor dining shed things. And I'm walking down. And there's this older couple, pretty old. And the gentleman was standing up and he had his hand extended to his partner. And he helped her up. And it just started to rain. And he took an umbrella, opened it up, put it over her, just her, not trying to squeeze himself in there. And they are just beaming at each other. The biggest smiles ever. And I saw this and in my head, I saw this and I thought, oh, that's so nice. That's so nice that they found each other. And then I thought, found each other. What I add that to it. And then I answered myself immediately with, oh, it's because they're both ugly. So I'm looking at pure love, pure love. And my fucking shitty takeoff this is, oh, good for you, you ugly fucks. That's nice. That's nice that you found each other. You guys know, yeah, nobody else would ever have you. So otherwise, you would have died alone with a cat eating your corpse or something.