Pete Holmes | Silly Silly Fun Boy (Full Comedy Special) [0:00-2:07]

Let's see if we can laugh at this. I got a big dumb Mormon face. You can laugh at that. Yeah, you can laugh. I told that joke in Utah. They fucking love me in Utah. They know. They know I have resting Latter-day Saint face. They know. They know. They love me in Salt Lake City. I'm like a parade float of a Mormon. They let me in the temple. I pet the dragon. It was awesome. Any Latter-day Saints here? Okay. Nobody stopped them. It's clearly not safe. Someone should have been like, Jeb and I. No. Malachar, stay in my hand. Oh, I love you. I'm not making fun of you. I'm not Mormon. I just look Mormon-y. I stop drinking. That's kind of Mormon-y. When you stop, yeah. When you stop drinking, you have to find new ways to party. Like, I still put Q-tips deep in my ear. You guys put Q-tips in your ear? Yeah, I knew you were cool. The reason I ask is, if you're at the back of the box and seen what the people of the Q-tip corporation say, a Q-tip is intended for, I'm not making this up. It doesn't say ear on the entirety of the box. They're just acting like they don't know that we're sticking it in and twisting and traveling through time. It's one of life's joys. You're just like, I can see how I die. It's amazing. They gaslight us. I'm not making this up. The first use, it says, first aid. What psycho is like, I have a gash. To the Q-tips. Like, that's...