Justice Consuelo Marie Callahan, Circuit Judge, United States Courts of Appeal [15:13-20:18]

in the sense I think that not knowing anyone and knowing what it's like to just you know having to make my way that way I'm I've always since him been the type of a person if I look in a room I always look around and see who's by themselves who seems to feel uncomfortable who doesn't know anyone and try to be welcoming along those lines because that always stuck with me but it also stuck with me in the sense that as lonely and alone as you feel there's always a light at the end of the tunnel and so it made me realize that you you have to be you know you sort of have to step out you have to be alone you have to be willing to walk through the tunnel to get to the light or if you want to change things you can't keep things the same and so I remember that so by the time I got to high school I did have a few friends I mean I had more than a few and and I always did have a lot of friends and I've always tended to I retain friends from my oldest friend for example goes back to when I was four years old and so I think at every point in my life I have friends that I've collected and moved forward and that I still see high school was I you know I'm one of those people too I guess I guess it'll probably sort of sound like I've always had a good time I remember high school fairly fondly I remember the first day I went I was very tiny smaller than I am now and walking and thinking oh my gosh there everyone's gonna know I'm a freshman you know I think I weighed less than a hundred pounds I was five feet one and I thought there's no way I'm gonna blend in here and but that'll worked out I think part of high school at that time I was already focused on going to college I knew the things that I had to do I was a serious student but I also was involved in a lot of extra curricular activities I was at that time for young women they weren't playing competitive sports as they are now I think that's something I would have done had it been more available and so the the outlet at that time was you were a cheerleader or a song girl and that's what girls did and and I did that and I was involved in other and other school activities and I think that I've always thought that I'd look like maybe I don't want to say all of my life people they don't so much now because I think people have broadened in their views it was we don't look like a lawyer you don't look like a judge all of those type of things and I think people didn't even although I my friends knew I was smart and but I don't think I looked that smart and so I think the part of my life was always trying to figure out how how can I blend in terms of so that I have the most access that I have the most opportunities but still be true to myself and I think probably because I was I was outgoing I was involved in a lot of the activities that tend to make students popular in high school probably I wasn't at all apologetic about getting straight A's wanting to be at the top of my class and those type of things because I don't think people thought that I was a nerd and I think I think high schoolers tend to be more concerned about fitting in rather than being true to themselves and so I think that's sort of how I weaved through that so you it sounds like your parents instilled you with some wisdom and pride and that you dealt with the early issues of adolescent of wanting to blend in and wanting to be popular but still being true to yourself and making sure you get the best opportunities sounds like high school was maybe not as traumatic for you as it might have been for other people who were pretty smart and popular at the same time yeah I had to wait for their vindication for later on yeah that was and I'm just gonna say that probably people who don't know you which is I'm gonna say outside the Sacramento and the California community probably still don't you don't look like a judge you must still get that for people who do not know you I think in a stereotypic sense yes because they somehow think about a great-haired man that looks very distinguished and but but I think everyone that knows me knows when I'm in court I'm pretty all about the business and I think I'm I have that I have a fun and whimsical down to earth friendly type of side but when it comes to doing work it's there's another side to that and I never had any difficulty either as a lawyer or as a judge you know controlling the dynamics of the courtroom I mean my kids even knew I guess that they're sort of a look I get on my face or a focus that I get that people even though I it